Sometimes I have brushes with fame.
I’m pretty sure most people do, but they don’t notice it because they don’t pay attention to the people around them as well as I do.
That’s not a slam – certain people would make better witnesses and I’m one of them.
Back in the late 80s, there was a little movie about Jerry Lee Lewis called Great Balls of Fire, which I happened to have seen and loved. I also met Mr. Lewis when I was a child, but that’s a whole other story.
Also in the late 80s, I worked at the Atlanta Journal & Constitution as a production assistant.
Many of the real estate customers I had to deal with were pre-pay accounts for their display ads, and not getting their money upfront was a fireable offense. I made it my business to get that money.
Of course they wanted their ads in the Sunday Homefinder, but the deadline was Thursday at 5:00, firm.
At about 4:15, a Mrs. Williams called me and told me her ad had to run in the Sunday paper. I ran around and got everything together and called her back and told her she’d need to drive that check down or call in a credit card.
And then things became difficult.
Because I pay attention to details and I watch movies all the way through the credits and I have a mind like a steel trap, I knew who I was talking to, but I wasn’t touching it with a ten-foot pole.
I’d been on the phone with her, working on other ads that were legal to run ready to be released, for a good fifteen minutes.
She got loud, telling me that ad jolly well better run, or I would face Dire Consequences.
Now. I do not yell. I can count on one hand the number of times I have raised my voice in the last twenty years (aside from at sporting events). I was as kind and gentle as I could be, explaining that I would be fired if I ran that ad without the money in hand.
She just snapped and started shrieking at me.
“Now you listen to me! Do you know who I am divorced from?!!”
And then all bets were off.
I responded mildly, “Yes, ma’am, I do, and if Jerry Lee Lewis comes down here with a check for $25oo in the next half hour, that ad will be in Sunday’s paper.”
You have never heard a woman use words like that woman did right then. I very nearly asked her what she ate with that mouth.
It was, hands down, one of the funniest things anybody has ever screeched at me.
great story. So, did she find a credit card?
That ad did not run.